Truthfully, I do argue that eventhough I set out to make success for myself, the relm of interference as in we must be other things to other people somehow manifested itself around the time I was en route to success. The issue here is who makes that decision. Well, I certainly would not contradict myself by saying that I wanted to be a success and then split off and become a shell of my many facets to satisfly the need for those to occupy my existence in order to fufill their lives of that void that they could not complete themselves and needed to survive. So if I were not the one to transport myself into rags then I should not be one to continually suffer, as the damage has already been done.
I think often about my lack of income and what job I can legally accept that would make me independent and very self sufficient as I desired to be in my late 20's. Ok, so I was not ready to move out; but I did enjoy the financial freedom I had back then. In my late 40's as I am now I am hampered with things such as retirement woes and the thought of where I would live if I could no longer live with my parents, since I do not make enough to be able to afford an apartment or room on my own.
Why complain now? Honestly, because when you look at life; how many times do you get to make your own decisions? I love my style(I'm single and the only one who has to live with it!) and I hate and really resent to have my parents still try and dictate how my room should appear. But then again, I should have though this out. If this is the way they want it to look "exactly the way it did when I was in my late 20's" then hey that's a reflection on them. They refuse to accept the fact that their children are grown and that it's time to clean up the mess and do work or hire someone to do it for them. Ultimately, to renovate the rooms into a home suitable for people their age, including the ages of their children as nobody is under 40. If their employers, relatives, and others who know them could ask them why they subject themselves to live in conditions that need to be changed or even mention that mentally you do no good by causing the occupants of the home to live this way, what do you think their response would be? Secondly, would an upscale employer hire one who decidedly kept rooms or furniture in a way that really upsets other occupants? Maybe an employer should think about this again and weigh the situation by determining if that employee can help the situation. Well, certainly if that employer pays that employee enough to do something about it then someone should initiate that that's where attention should be paid. However if that employee does not make enough money to move out, to get one's own apartment then there should be a call about decisions and being able to make them in regards to the room the offspring lives in.
Most people want their bosses to have a very good regard and thought about them. But if the boss saw how you lived or how your offspring are living inside your home(be it not homeless) but a dismal room view of what indigent is like; what would that superior think of you and the decisions you make or keep others from making as a result from nonsensible control? He or she may say it's ok as long as the garbage you do at home does not affect the workplace here. Maybe it already has, as you look at your roster of employees and what a person does in terms of task. Then it all comes together.
You cannot ignore the 800 pound gorilla in the room just as it is difficult to ignore a heavy piece of furniture. Im speaking about the bunk iron rail beds, although symbolically it could remind someone of the iron horse otherwise known as the train; that takes up a great amount of space thus preventing the room from being a suitable living space. At my age there's no need for the 800 pound gorilla to be there, I've taken my lack of success and moved on in that I refuse to systemically pass on such failure to any future generation. Other people may like the 800 pound gorilla there because it reminds them of younger years of excessive control and "good times" or at least the planning of them. As for others things in the past may be painful because of what could have been.
But there still remains that heavy piece of furniture I want removed because( as I have no control over the decision to move it), I need to pursue my way of design, space and living for an individual who is no longer in her late 20's.
I'm longing for that creative independence I eventually wanted as an adult. I want space and freedom to decor as I want to live in. Heaven is beautiful and success is sky's the limit I'm sure. By the way,there is a train line called the New Haven Line here on earth. If anyone knows a way to assist me in my independence legally,(no ho, for the money calls) please send me an eartly response, other than the 800 pound gorilla.